If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Randomize
