I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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