Banned from zoo.
Again?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
