I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
as a side note pls kill me
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
