no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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