It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
