Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
