just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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