At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
Boobs speak an international language.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
Randomize
