Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I just blew my weed a kiss
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
I sent her a dick pic and used brett Favre's dick pick. She asked me why I had pictures of old men's dicks saved on my phone... I just can't win bro
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