Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
Randomize