you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
