Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
