Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
Randomize
