How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Apparently she was filling Miller Lite bottles with water because I refused to be seen drinking water in a bar
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
