Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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