yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Randomize
