sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
