he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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