Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
