drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
Randomize
