I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
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