another moral hangover. fuck.
Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
