i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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