Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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