Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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