He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Randomize
