**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Randomize