i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize
