He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
