Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
