He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
