I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize
