what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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