he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
My vagina is officially offended.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Randomize