Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
