Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
