is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize