i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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