I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
I'm standing on the corner in a banana costume and cape with frozen bananas in my utility belt reassessing my life decisions.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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