at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
