you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
