everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
I think my moral compass just broke
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
