She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
