is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize