how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
