my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
birth control should be required to get into college
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize