you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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