I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
