I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
