speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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