So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
Randomize
